Friday, April 28, 2006

YOU GOTTA HAVE STANDARDS

My friend, the Analyzer and I were talking on the phone the other day. Both of us being stay-at-home Moms......our conversation turned to domestic issues:

(warning: boring & graphic content - conversation condensed)

A: "Is grass stains hot or cold water?"
Me: "I don't know. My Mom does my laundry."
A: "That's what I like about you. You are not afraid to say you don't know."
Me: "I'm thinking about getting one of those large capacity washers."
A: "Sally down the street has one and she loves it."
Me: "Don't you have a front-loader?"
A: "Yes."
Me: "Do you like it cause' my friend bought one and had it returned."
A: "Why?"
Me: "She said the washer didn't use enough water and it wrinkled all of her clothes."
A: "Well I guess it does wrinkle them but the dryer usually takes care of the cottons. Anyway, I take Davie-O's shirts to the cleaners to get pressed."
Me: "I keep telling Bubby to do that because it takes him so friggin long to iron one shirt. And there's no way I'm ironing his shirts. I didn't sign up for that when I got married."
A: "Hmmm..."
Me: "I'll suck his d***k but I won't iron his shirts."
A: "A girl's gotta have standards. Prostitute or Maid?"
Me: "Clearly I would rather be a Prostitute with no pay. This is a really sad, sad realization."
Me: "How did we get from grass stains to fellatio?"
A: "Heck if I know."
Me: "Oh well, I gotta go. Talk to you later........."
A: "Bye."

Oh the life of a bored housewife...................

2 comments:

MomSquared said...

Hm..I totally agree with you. Blow jobs over laundry anyday.

Anonymous said...

Ok... complete Overshare... I don't need to think of Bubby in that way.... Brad Pitt... maybe... Bubby... eh' no.... Kendoll