Saturday, January 07, 2006

OH LORD.....HERE WE GO AGAIN

This picture may indicate what is going to happen to Bubby's brain shortly. Shall I explain?

Bubby and I have New Years Resolutions. So do Christian and Leroy. Here they are:

Bubby**To spend more wisely and reduce our monthly output by canceling cable, extra cell phones and eating out less.

Tallulah**To re-organize our home, get rid ofall of the crap, and make a functional home for all.

Leroy**To be more happy. (Is that possible? Leroy is a walking, talking example of happiness)

Christian**To go outside and play more. (Or even actually go to someone else's house to play)
**To not kill his brother Leroy or slit his own wrists from lack of options.

You may laugh. Go ahead. Get it out of your system all of you sadistic little shits. But between happy Leroy, stressed out Bubby, wired and out of control Mom, Tori who didn't even make a resolution because she couldn't think of one (and hinted that she really had nothing to work on) and Christian quickly running out of options. Life is like Hell.............but worse.

So today, after HOURS of discussion between Bubby and myself (Might I add that the children were running around like Banshees the entire time. Destroying household items. Throwing food around. Shooting foam bullets in to every glass object that we own), we decided to do some major re-organization.

1. Move Christian and Izzy in to one room to share (currently the office that Bubby spent two weeks re-painting in a specific olive green containing sand so that he could feel "happy" while he paid bills, wrote scripts and played the guitar).

2. Move the office and workout equipment up to Izzy's room.

3. Give all front living room furniture to Ice-J and his fiancee that are moving in to their first apartment in four days.

4. Create "Pottery Barn-like" playroom in front room for all of Izzy's big items like train tables, wooden kitchens and every other large ticket toddler item known to man.

5. Purchase Banana Chairs for the kids to play videos and watch T.V. in their basement playroom.

6. Purchase new bedroom furniture for Izzy and Christian.(Which we did on Saturday.....$800 later).

7. Decorate Leroy's bedroom now that Christian is out of it.........the way Leroy wants. (Leroy's suggestion.........half of the room decorated with neckties and bowties and the other half with Star Wars-----this my friends is a whole 'nother blog).

Have I missed anything? Oh, I'm sure I have but I'm getting sleepy just thinking of all the work that is ahead of us. Enough to throw me back in to Pneumonia I imagine.

Christian is so excited I am sure he peed his pants. Izzy is in total denial of his move and will eventually end up in counseling as an adult over this parental decision.

Have you noticed something about all of these New Years Resolutions? Bubby is getting the short end of the stick here.

Make wifey happy?
Spend less money.
Make wifey happy?
Spend less money.

Oh, the delicate balance a bread-winner must create to make family peace.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

HIP HIP HOORAY!!!
I'LL ACTUALLY SEE THE DAY
THAT THE "DANGEROUS" GLASS TABLES
ARE FINALLY GOING AWAY!!!