Okay. Enough with the flies. I'm on to earwigs now......
Way Down In Mayberry, we have had an earwig problem. Maybe it's because instead of killing any bug, I gently take it outside. The earwigs have decided this is the place to hang out. The worst thing that will happen is that they will get misplaced from their earwig family temporarily as I put the earwig outside. The earwig can then find their way back in and have a nice "family reunion" with their other family members.
The kids call them pincher bugs. Christian is so scared of pincher bugs (and spiders for that matter) that he is paralyzed with fear. Christian won't go in the basement alone or any room alone in case there may be a spider or pincher bug waiting to jump on his face and attack him. Christian has this high-pitched girly scream that sends me in to fits of rage. I can't take much more.
When I was young, I watched a scary episode of The Twilight Zone. In this particular episode, an earwig entered some guys ear. At the end of the program the earwig came out the other side of his ear, but not without laying a thousand earwig eggs inside his brain...thus, making this poor gentleman insane. I slept with cotton in my ears for two solid months.
Now I'm thinking about telling Christian the laying-eggs-in-the-brain story. Really, it can't get any worse. I'm hoping by making this fiction a fact, Christian will see a pincher bug on the floor and think, "No big deal...the bugs not in my brain." Maybe knowing that a bug can do a lot worse damage to you than pinch you will make him realize that seeing one crawling across the floor is not a "screaming from the room at the top of your lungs" kind of emergency. I could care less if he sleeps with cotton in his ears until he's twelve. I just want the screaming....Oh good Lord, he's started AGAIN!
What do you think? Should I completely screw up my child with a story like this?
The Down & Dirty
- tallulah
- I'm a stay-at-home Mom of five(one has left the nest). My attitudes are somewhat morbid and twisted as I desperately try to fit in to the town of Mayberry. I'm committed to my husband and children however, I often fantasize about filling up at the gas station and then driving to some obscure little town in the middle of the desert where no one can find me. I'm hoping that someday the pharmecuetical companies develop a drug that can ZEN me through this strange life I have built for myself. In the meantime....I blog and explore ways of coping. Your comments are appreciated.
2 comments:
I wouldnt recommend telling christian that story, it would probably make him even more scared, and scarred for life. But i do understand your dilemma on what to do with christian, i do despise a childs annoting screams also, i have neighbors with annoying kids... Maybe, instead of 'gently' taking them out of your house, you should just kill them, or step on them or something. Thats what i do and i dont have very many bug problems, except for last week a earwig pincherbug or whatever crawled on my foot, and i saw a pair of scissors on my night stand and chopped off its head, i could find the body later but hopefully it doesnt live for a week without it head like cockroaches do, its just really gross...
I wouldnt recommend telling christian that story, it would probably make him even more scared, and scarred for life. But i do understand your dilemma on what to do with christian, i do despise a childs annoting screams also, i have neighbors with annoying kids... Maybe, instead of 'gently' taking them out of your house, you should just kill them, or step on them or something. Thats what i do and i dont have very many bug problems, except for last week a earwig pincherbug or whatever crawled on my foot, and i saw a pair of scissors on my night stand and chopped off its head, i could find the body later but hopefully it doesnt live for a week without it head like cockroaches do, its just really gross...
Post a Comment