Monday, August 14, 2006

I WAS VERY, VERY WRONG


Did you read my blog on "SCHOOL'S STARTING?" I was all weepy about my children going back to school. I must have been pre-menstrual.

This past week has been a painful reminder of why I send my children away for several hours a day rather than homeschool them:

1. Izzy has decided that being potty-trained at an early age of two has given him the right to revert back to peeing in his pants several times a day SIX DAYS before starting his "must-be-potty-trained-preschool-or-we-kick-him-out-after-a-week." The child has been potty-trained for over a year. He is punishing me.

2. Tori has taken on a "You suck and Dad is God" attitude. Complete with comments like, "If Dad were here, he would let me do that." and "Dad loves me more than you do."

3. Izzy decided to call his brother a fuck face in front of his out of town Grandmother. Really, if you could have seen her face go pale......

4. Christian has reverted in to this whining, crying, lazy kid with a REALLY bad attitude.

5. Leroy pulled a swell one this morning. While my friend the Analyzer and I were having a lovely cup of coffee, he pounced on his brother and bit him (yes, with rabid teeth) in his eye. Christian's eye is swollen and the skin is punctured. Christian later told me that if only I wasn't so engrossed with a discussion with my friend, I could have jumped up and saved him from Leroy. Now it is MY fault that Christian was bitten.

6. My house is trashed. My laundry is piled to ceiling. I putting out fires right after my kids are creating them and enough is enough!

GO BACK TO SCHOOL SO I CAN DRINK MARTINI'S AND WATCH TRASHY TELEVISION!

There. I've said it. I rescind my former blog post!

2 comments:

MomSquared said...

Oh man. When you're old, they should revere you and serve you in any way you desire.

The Analyzer said...

It was great coffee, and to your credit, I would have done EXACTLY the same thing you did with the fighting pile of cats on the couch. I would have waited for them to work it out, of course that would have been based on the assumption that no one was going to bite an EYE!!! But then again, if you drop by my house, it's fairly clear I know nothing.