SUCKER

What is up with my friend "The Analyzer" lately? Has she lost her child-centered volunteer-at-the-school-for-every-committee-meeting mind? It seems that Ms. Analyzer has roped me in to another project DISGUISED as a good deed for the Way Down In Mayberry School.

Yep, it is not enough that I spend HOURS every day helping my three (in school) children with homework at an advanced education. Nor is it enough that I spend one day a week volunteering at their school. Did I mention I spent HUNDREDS of dollars helping the school with supplies and buy all of the extras like PTA calendars, Support Mayberry t-shirts etc....
Do I need to take out a frickin loan to finance my children's education? If that's the case......just make it a private school and I'll go buy them the navy and white uniforms and we will call it good!

Now Ms. Analyzer is very good at persuasion. She helps me raise the bar on what a bad parent I am being. Here is a woman with four small children of her own, putting people like me (a.k.a. the loser Mom's just trying to keep up) to shame. Ms. Analyzer came up with a great idea involving food...................my weakness. So we are offering ourselves as chefs, caterers, servers for a party of 12 at an auction. You know, a little Tuscan feast. Oh Lord!

I am so grateful for my friend. She helps me realize how important it is to help out the school, community blah blah blah with her exceptionally perky and positive attitude. I think she is trying to stomp out my morbid, dark, political and oh, so negative attitude and it may be working. I am actually looking forward (kinda) to putting my foodie skills to use to help further my children's education.

Just shoot me now.