VACUUM IS GETTING A WORKOUT

I love my dog Mistie. Half German Shepherd and half Husky. Mistie is intelligent and loving. She is extremely protective of the children. But I have a feeling Mistie doesn't love me nearly as much. Her German Shepherd instincts say that she should only have one owner she is loyal to. Surprise! Surprise! It is not me.

Great. I spend all day with this dog and her whole life revolves around when Bubby is going to get home from work. Bubby this. Bubby that. Oh, Mistie tolerates me. Mistie will even pretend to like me (especially if I say the word TREAT). But there is no way in hell that Mistie will let me brush her.

Do you remember me saying that it is damn hot way down here in Mayberry? Well Mistie is molting. Big time. Her Husky coat is falling off in chunks everywhere. This is not one or two little dust bunnies floating around. This is a national emergency.

What happens if I try to brush Mistie? She bites me. Repeatedly. The only one she will let brush her is Bubby. Now if you read the HOUSE CLEANING blog, you will remember that Bubby has a hard time starting a project. Okay, I'm being nice. Bubby is paralyzed by starting a new project. Once Bubby starts brushing Mistie, it will take hours (I'm not exaggerating) before Mistie will be done. I don't blame Bubby. If it took me several hours to brush a dog, I wouldn't brush Mistie either. I would just let the hair clumps fall where they may and wait for my mentally insane wife to vacuum up the mess.

Hence, today. Here I am on a Monday morning looking at the hair and wondering how long I can take it. I vacuumed four times yesterday. And here's the part that kills me.....Bubby has the nerve to ask me to move the vacuum hose out of his office so that he can keep his office tidy. Huh? Yes people. Bubby doesn't want the vacuum hose lying around the office. I mentioned that:

1. Bubby hasn't used his office for writing movie scripts since last year.
2. I will be taking the vacuum hose in and out of the office four more times tomorrow, so it will be a cold day in hell when I pack the hose away in the closet just to get it out again in a couple of hours.

Hey, I've got an idea....

BRUSH THE DAMN DOG BUBBY!

Between the flies (see "Obsessive Behavior For The Week" blog) and the dog hair, I'm very close to losing it. I'm thinking about taking a nice long walk in the foothills with Mistie. Sometimes collars break way from leashes and dogs get lost....it really is a tragedy.