Every once in a while, a couple that we know that has been married forever with no children, decide to have children. Sometimes I wonder if it is out of boredom, or not knowing what to do next with their lives. Sometimes I wonder if our society has ingrained in us that this is what we do next......find a spouse, get married, have kids, end of story.
It's good that these couples took the time to decide I guess. They have traveled all over the world, spent gobs of money on needless items, reached their career goals, ate out five times a week and have partied a good part of their adulthood away. "It's time to settle down" they say.
How do you tell the couple that "settling down" is not in the parenthood creed?
*Sleepless nights (crying baby)
*Constant worry (is he sick? is it an ear infection?)
*Financial burden (the stroller costs how much? formula is outrageously priced!)
*Relationship tested (8 weeks until we can have sex after the baby? it's week nine and she still doesn't want to have sex.)
*Postpartum (she hasn't washed her hair in 3 weeks!)
You get the picture.
I was discussing this topic with Bubby last week. He said there is no way to tell a couple what lies ahead. They wouldn't understand it and you certainly wouldn't want to burst their happy little pregnancy bubble. It's something they will have to discover for themselves. He's right. And with all of the angst associated with a new baby, having no fricking clue how to take care of it and all the pressures associated with being responsible for another life...it's wonderful and perfect.
Case and point:
After all of the hell Izzy put us through during pregnancy, delivery, being a colicky baby and now being a toddler demon...he still on occasion can say something that makes it all worth it.
Last night while Izzy was snuggling up to Bubby in bed, thumb in mouth, directly looking up in to Bubby's eyes he said:
"I want it to be like this forever Papa."
It's good that these couples took the time to decide I guess. They have traveled all over the world, spent gobs of money on needless items, reached their career goals, ate out five times a week and have partied a good part of their adulthood away. "It's time to settle down" they say.
How do you tell the couple that "settling down" is not in the parenthood creed?
*Sleepless nights (crying baby)
*Constant worry (is he sick? is it an ear infection?)
*Financial burden (the stroller costs how much? formula is outrageously priced!)
*Relationship tested (8 weeks until we can have sex after the baby? it's week nine and she still doesn't want to have sex.)
*Postpartum (she hasn't washed her hair in 3 weeks!)
You get the picture.
I was discussing this topic with Bubby last week. He said there is no way to tell a couple what lies ahead. They wouldn't understand it and you certainly wouldn't want to burst their happy little pregnancy bubble. It's something they will have to discover for themselves. He's right. And with all of the angst associated with a new baby, having no fricking clue how to take care of it and all the pressures associated with being responsible for another life...it's wonderful and perfect.
Case and point:
After all of the hell Izzy put us through during pregnancy, delivery, being a colicky baby and now being a toddler demon...he still on occasion can say something that makes it all worth it.
Last night while Izzy was snuggling up to Bubby in bed, thumb in mouth, directly looking up in to Bubby's eyes he said:
"I want it to be like this forever Papa."
Just that one statement alone, is enough to sustain me for the rest of my life.
2 comments:
And THAT is what makes parenting so worth it.
I always say that I wish people had clued me as to how difficult it would be, but then I think perhaps in this case ignorance is truly for the best. Not bliss, mind you, just best.
And reminding myself every hour that "this too shall pass". It really works to lie to yourself.
OH, last night at around 5am, Baby J did something and I said the same damn thing! LOL Big J just looked at me and said, "uh ok, whatever get's you through but I wouldn't have gone THAT far!" LOL
Sigh- I agree with Jenn, it's for the best. Althought to be honest I remember someone meantioning it a time or two and I blew them off. What did they know anyways? LOL
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